Although I first saw Pentargon in September 2011, it had been looking for me (or vice-versa) since late 2010 when I had started my search for a canal boat. I'd been told that if you have patience to just keep looking for the right boat and have a proper shopping list, the boat will find you and this was my experience. It has taken a while to get to where we are today, many road miles, many detours, many viewings, each viewing an eventual no-go.
patiently til I was just about to give up. Then its spirit went on the
offensive and nudged me to at least have a look. It was late August 2011
and I'd been to one marina too many and viewed one
more crap boat too many. What is was about Pentargon I had no idea. On-line pictures had not appealed to me and the price was much too
high. But first sight turned out to be love at first sight. This was a right ugly gosling but something about her lines was "right" even though I had no idea
I could not put a finger on an instinct. But this boat was the one. The next hurdle is how to buy her. One
COULD have gone the Appalling Dick route and pay serious wonga for what
you could see above the water line and, (although you don't yet know
it), what you could not see below water. One could buy a money-bucket into which to pour all one's hard-earned and one would still not have a sorted boat.
One can travel the straight, tedious, narrow path,
doggedly paring away at the brokerage system,
and the road miles and the disappointments
and eventually get just what you want.
I'm of the latter persuasion.
Pentargon was in the hands of a broker.
Brokers can be the most tedious of tychkes: in fact they possibly usually are. Mine certainly was. You only get to drive the boat you might want to buy from a broker if you're very lucky ... If
they're having a good day, they may show you around a usually unsuitable boat. Or not. They may
wave in the general direction of whatever will make the most profit for
them. Sometimes they'll permit you to have a prowl around on and
you may even get to see inside an actual boat. In my case, I pointed at an ugly gosling and asked "How much?" Having a drive was out of the question. Starting the engine was out of the question. To even look inside, I had to prise a key from between his clenched teeth, kinda like you do with an oyster. Oh! Neither do you get to kick tyres.
serious about buying something a stiff necked broker is offering, you can't just call in a surveyor to give it a right going-over (as you would with a house or a car or a
painting). Buying a boat is done on the same contract as would be used
to purchase the royal yacht Britannia (or the Titanic come to think of
'Full' survey costs around £500 + the dreaded VAT (add £100). AND
you have to pay to have the boat hauled out, which will knock you back
another few hundred squid. AND! In some cases the boat may be miles from
where it can be pulled out! And! If you are looking at a
SPRINGER, which I was, the hauler-out may cream you for an excess on the
basis that he has to user a special cradle to haul it out because it has not got a flat bottom.
This may or may not be a total load of bollox (some newer Springers and ALL waterbugs do have a serious angle to the bottom!) but you don't know that at the time so you pay up. There's a really serious catch though for first-time buyers or anytime buyers doing the business through a broker ... Just ... remember ... you ... heard ... it ... here ... 36ft Springers have a very shallow angle and really can be treated as thought they are flat-bottomed.
You can only have a boat surveyed
after you've made an offer in writing on a legally watertight contract
and after your offer has been accepted by the seller.
Sounds daft, but that is how the system works.
have to lay down a [10%] deposit and commit to purchase: "subject to
survey" before a surveyor is allowed near the boat. This is a good time
to underline that a particular broker may have "mutual arrangements'
with particular surveyors. I know at least one broker/marina where, if
you plump for your own surveyor who has no erm 'agreement' in place, the stiff neck requires that the boat surveying is done out in the cut, but in clear view of their pillbox/snipers post! Fat
chance of getting at the only part which matters. The wetted hull. Watch yeerselfs out
there. Lunatic soup it are; there are some right sharks in and around the soup ; there is some VERY interesting small print in the "legally watertight
if the survey shows up multiple small defects which can be 'fixed' within a certain budget the fixing has to be done by the SELLER or his ... "AGENT"... but at the BUYER'S expense.Now take a guess at who that "agent" might be?
This is where some rite shite work gets done, as in some ... right ... shight ... work.
The broker has you over a barrel and knows it
so he gets in a baboon,
pays the simian peanuts,
gets some monkey work done,
and hoovers up the margin,
noosing a surveyor into the deal
while muggins pays a wad of wonga ON TOP of the purchase price, for a boat which enters your life ropey.
This was NOT applicable to my purchase I hasten to add but appears to be what happened to Pentargon
when the previous owner was purchasing it ten years previously ...
Buyers come in all shapes and sizes and skills and cunning but rarely
will they have a background in sheet metal fabrication, gas
installation, plumbing, AC/DC electricity, carpentry, glazing, engines,
gearboxes, weed-hatches, sign-writing, galvanic corrosion and the best
price for a length of string.
Fortunately for Pentargon, she was now under the gimlet eye of someone with all those skills and much more, but who engagingly looks, acts and talks like a cretin. It's part of my charm. Unfortunately for the last owner, his dreams of clearing a profit were about to float down Shit Creek Without a Paddle. He's the one I felt sorry for.
a boat fails survey under the terms of the legally binding contract
(because the faults cannot be put right for x% of the agreed price) the
buyer can pull out of the deal and walk away. But all you get back is your deposit.
You have to be prepared to 'lose' up to £800 (for survey, slipping
and slippage) and have nothing to show for it at the end of the day
apart from a gaping hole in your wallet about the same size as as a nice holiday in
Sometimes this may be the right way to go and the right thing
to do especially if BIG WONGAS are involved. For me, I was laying out
BIG WONGAS: like my whole life-savings at the time ... aka ... my future
There's an interesting side issue to a failed survey.
in doing the test, the surveyor might knock a hole through the hull
under the waterline with his little hammer. Under these circumstances,
the boat would be instantly failed and could not be put back in the
water until repaired. The boat is, of that moment, both unsaleable and unsailable
as the hole so hammered might cause the boat to sink in the water. This
sort of clause matters with the Titanic, which went down in 11,000' of
water but it also applies to canal boats which might not have
2" of free water under them at most times.
This little is gem is entered into the discussion
for the advantage of readers who might be
SELLING a boat which gets surveyed.
If the survey is not quite ok and a weak spot in the hull or a dodgy engine problem is found which can be fixed for less than 5% of the agreed purchase price (on £22,000 that would be £1100) you're obliged by contract to ask the seller to fix it at YOUR expense and have the surveyor rubber-stamp the fix. See notes above about connivance between interested parties further up and be assured the misfortunate seller is rarely party to these shenanigans. You are also legally obliged to go through with the purchase without any legal or financial recourse. ...
I can guarantee from observation, research and talking to others who got thus burned
you'll have bought ... a pup, ... a dog ... and a-pig-in-a-poke ... all in a single transaction.
So this is how the term "Think Fast Buy Slow" can be applied. Once the boat is yours, so are the ALL the inherited problems.
It is entirely justifiable and eminently sensible to Make Haste ever so slowly.
'normal' way a surveyor proceeds is to go over the boat in the water
"as seen". His "brief" (even if unspoken) is to find anything and
everything which his client - YOU - can use to pull the price down!
Once the inside is done and the engine tested afloat, the surveyor gets
the yard to haul the boat out so he can check the "wetted hull": provided he is not on the yard's black list.
purchasers might be able to use this haul-out to steam-clean or pressure wash the
bottom, check anodes, examine blacking, thus securing maybe
four years happy boating before it has to be hauled out again. Be aware
however that you are messing with someone else's boat. But life is a
game and a series of challenges and I know at least one marina where almost every boat afloat has a thick coat of zebra mussels all over the wetted hulls.
Most surveyors are BSS certified and some/most? will include a Safety Certificate within the cost of a full survey if it is helpful or applicable. In Pentargon's case her 4yr BSS was due to run out in April 2012 so a bonus was coming with the survey (provided it passed) because the survey was scheduled for mid January and the BSS could be forwarded to it's expiry date. In the event it did not apply as Pentargon's survey was eventually completed in MAY 2012 after she had been bottomed and the surveyor had passed her. The very best surveyors may charge higher rates but you get a better product from the best. Think Tesco - Waitrose. Trevor Whitling from Crick is right at the top of my class.
The buying of a boat from a broker is absolutely outside credit card territory.
Brokers have separate accounts for sales, moorings, repairs, and
fettlin'n' fuellin'. So your hard earned may have to be moved by
you to a current account to allow you to pay the balance by cheque.
Provided of course your potential purchase has passed it's survey. To reduce the pissin abart, you might consider getting a banker's draft: it works like cash and the charge might speed things up ... Or
Pentargon FAILED her survey comprehensively on the 4mm rule